what they really want to do?

[morwen]

The Government announced today a radical reform to the welfare system, the largest shakeup in 233 years since the Poor Law of 1601 was introduced. A new "eligibility" test will be introduced to ensure that people capable of working will have to, and a network of support organisations set up to provide help.

"In many cases the problem is not that there aren't jobs: there are", said the Secretary of State in a speech last night. "The problem is that people are too proud to take the jobs they can get. The way to solve this is to take pride out of the equation by utterly humiliating them."

The plans call for those claiming benefits at present to be divided into several categories. Those "genuinely physically unable to do manual work, such as quadriplegics" will continue to recieve payments to sustain themselves in the community - to be called "outdoor relief". The rest will be encouraged to find work - which they should be able to accept as because any work available should be more eligible than no work.

A network of "productivity homes" will be set up throughout the country, under local authority and faith control. These productivity homes will provide facilities for people who are unable to look after themselves or cannot find work. Those able to will be set to useful tasks to defray the cost of the productivity homes, which will also be funded by a tax on the rentable value of property within the local area. Residents of productivity homes will be confined to the house at all hours whilst living there, in order to prevent them secretly taking jobs. They will, of course, be free to leave entirely and move back into the wider society at any time.

Comments

[feuermaus.livejournal.com]

What's quite scary is that you've hit the nail bang on the head there! Just give them a few years and I'm sure they will find a way of doing it. What's more, is it bad that in some ways I don;t think it's a bad thing? If the Jobcentre actually did *it's* job and helped people find the work that they were suited for then they wouldn't have so many people slipping through the net. I can't believe as a post-grad I was out of work for almost 10 months, not out lack of trying for jobs but because the jobs that were there I was overqualified for and they wouldn't touch me with a barge pole!

I like your satire though ....

[tankgirlinblack.livejournal.com]

It took me about the same time to get a relavent job after I graduated.

I went to the job center once during that time.
I thought I'd talk to someone while I was there. He kept on trying to give me information on courses I could take. I lost track of how many times I said I had the qualifications, it was the employment I was finding hard to get.
So then he rang an employer of for a job that had CAD in the title (not listening to me pointing out I didn't have any of the engineering skills listed in the job description) then handed the phone to me. So I ended up apologiseing to the person on the other end of the line for wasting their time.

They don't know how to deal with someone who has an idea of where they are going. I didn't need help getting qualifications, and I certainly didn't need help in getting in touch with possible employers. Though to be fair most of the other people in there either were barely literate/could hardly string a sentance together either because they were chavs or not british born, and they do *need* someone to ring people up and ask about jobs for them.

[barakta]

The jobcentre always seem surprised when I can spell my own name. They advised that I as a deaf person applied for callcentre work - or as a sign language interpreter. The latter suggestion was made by my disability employment advisor. Nice man, but completely useless.

I also have fun explaining that information management is not computer science and even less software engineering.

Their disability support is laughable, what work I did get after graduating was entirely through my own efforts. At least I know how to work the system and refuse to use their phone systems at all. I know how to get past the frontline monkeys at the jobcentre too.

[tankgirlinblack.livejournal.com]

I found myself getting anygry at the guy I spoke to because he was being what I though was incredably patronising, but I realised he needed to say this stuff to nearly everyone he dealt with, and probably didn't actually know how to deal with someone actually capable of applying for jobs without him doing it all for them.

[barakta]

Well I still laugh that the jobcentre told me to apply for callcentre work. My DEA advised that I get a job as a sign language interpreter....

The income support for sick people seem a little less dimwitted, but sadly I'm too ill to work even if I wanted to. I may try and stay on IS and get work from that cos the advisors are at least polite, audible and are willing to learn clue.